Self-Made Mom

A snowstorm in April:

This is not what I call “spring skiing.”

A random product I reviewed a long time ago (so long that I can’t even find it in my archives) staring at me from the bar where I was enjoying a drink called, “The Geisha.”

To my knowledge, Gloves in a Bottle is NOT a key ingredient to the Geisha drink.

Making it onto Alltop Moms. I can’t even believe I’m in the company listed on this site. I’m all the way at the bottom, but who cares, I’m there! (Thanks, Nicole.)

Kim, thanks for the button. That about sums it up for me too!

Seeing many friends of mine in the blogosphere meeting KATIE COURIC in NYC. Beth, next time you offer me a chance like this, remind me that my husband will always be there, while Katie may not be. You guys rock!!

Vacationing alone with hubby is overrated compared to meeting #1 female celebrity. Just kidding, honey.

That’s all until I get back from snowy paradise…

Edited to add: I SO did NOT meet Katie!! I think re-reading the caption it makes me sound like I did, but I didn’t. Just jealous of those that did. Next time I’ll get out of my vacation haze and proof before I write!

• Don’t look at me that way. In 5-10 years, you too, may find yourself dragging a screaming toddler up the escalator on the way to find velvet throw pillows to cover the puke stains on your couch.
• Trust me, a toddler throwing grapes on the floor is much better than smushing them in his hands.
• You most likely won’t ever hold your significant other’s hand while shopping for silverware again.
• I guarantee you’ll never unpack that Krups ice cream maker. It’s ok.  Four years later and I haven’t opened mine yet.

Still dusty after all these years.

• The love you have for each other will never equal the love you have for a brand-new set of non-stick Calphalon pans.

And while I was picking on unsuspecting couples at Crate and Barrel, here’s what was happening on the web:

• The Secret Lives of Soccer Moms goes postal: I realized that after I talked to Tracey and watched the premiere episode, I forgot to Tivo the series.  Which means I missed out on following all the crazy backlash the show is getting on the web.  Holy crap, people. Get a life. It’s a TV show. Geez.
•  Mickey’s going to be eating matzah one day: The Disney “blunder” is no more. Go Devra! Hope they like your charoset.
• Just what I want to read before going to bed at night: I don’t see the point of reading a fictional book about the life I’m leading. Sounds to me like another helping of the Mommy Wars hype with a different title.
• I started a new pet project. Click here to see the beginning of genius.
• ** Edited to add: Have you all seen this new site Alltop? I’ve read about it like 4 times today, so I had to write about it. It collects all the top blogs on the web according to different categories. It’s a great way to see all of your favorite sites’ top 5 posts in a few scrolls of the mouse. There is even a category for mom blogs, but you won’t see me there (yet?) so don’t forget to come back and visit here after you scroll away!

Tags: The Secret Life of Soccer Moms, The Ten-Year Nap, Meg Wolitzer, mommy wars, Disney, Alltop

No, I didn’t go back to work or anything crazy like that, but I did take on an assignment that has deadlines and everything! I’m going to be writing for Work It! Mom’s newest blog, Moms on Issues.  I’ll be tag teaming with esteemed blogger Veronica, writing about all the social and political issues moms face with on a daily basis and how moms are covered in the media.

So take a whirl at our first two posts and let us know what you think!

And kudos to Susan, my first blog friend, who’s teaming up with us over at Mommy Track’d. Can’t wait to see what she comes up with…

It’s always fun to see how celebrities are quoted about how they handle motherhood and work.  So when I came across this story in USA Today I couldn’t resist quoting yet the newest working mom on the block - Julianna Margulies, who’s starring in a new show, Canterbury’s Law, this Monday night. In the series, she plays a ball-buster lawyer. In real life, she’s mom to six-week-old Kieran.  I’m sure she was asked the obligatory, “how did you handle pregnancy and working?” question, which elicited this response:

I got pregnant by surprise at the end of April, and in May, we found out we were picked up. I don’t want to be the working mother. We’ve seen it a million times. How do you juggle? And it is impossibly difficult, as I’m now finding out.

Furthermore, she was against writing her pregnancy into the show. Most times I find it irritating when celebrities wax poetic or give unrealistic advice about the beauty of working and raising their children on movie sets or whatever.  So, thanks Julianna for keeping it real. It is impossible to juggle.

Tags: Julianna Marguiles, working moms, celebrity moms, Canterbury’s Law

I just finished watching the premiere episode of TLC’s new show, “The Secret Life of a Soccer Mom,” and I have to be honest - I liked it way more than I thought I would.  I knew plenty about the show after talking to the host, Tracey Gold, yesterday, but typically I don’t let my DVR record things that have the words “Secret” and “Mom” in the same title (sounds kind of like a bad Lifetime move, don’t you think?).  However, after whizzing through the show in about 45 minutes, I found myself with a bit of a lump in my throat and a little more happiness about the choice I made to be a SAHM.

The first episode centered on Adrian Stark, wife of a doctor and a mom of three.  A wannabe fashion designer before she had kids, the show gave Ms. Stark the opportunity to work for fashion designer Bianca Nero for a week under the guise that she was “going to a spa.” (Hence, the “secret.” Lifetime references abound.) So while she went off to her new “job,” her husband stayed at home watching the girls. It was your typical here’s-what-happens-when-the-mom-works-scenario with the kids running wild and the house in disarray. Let’s just say if there are assistants who cook the food all day while you’re away it’s not that realistic.

And watching Ms. Stark do her assignment was kind of like watching a summer intern at work.  The bosses came down hard and fast and Ms. Stark looked frazzled and nervous.  I can only imagine, though, how she must have felt, considering before I interviewed Ms. Gold yesterday (my first “real” story since I stopped working) I was sweating like a pig.  The point? It’s hard to rejigger your brain into work mode after you’ve been in SAHM mode. I thought the show treated that shift well.

Some folks were a little bothered by the secretive nature of the show, but I just chalked it up to the fact that it’s on TV. I mean, how else were they going to get those moms out of the house? I know if I want to leave for a day I have to book it like 3 weeks in advance, call in major reinforcements and clear it with a slew of people. Anyway, *spoiler alert* at the end of the show, Ms. Stark does a great job, gets the job of her dreams and accepts a full-time position with the designer. Dad seemed truly happy for her and the kids were thrilled. (This is the part where I got a lump in my throat.)  It was sweet, really. You could tell that she loved staying at home with her kids, but wanted to try something new, so kudos to her!

This show isn’t going to be for everyone, though. Some will think it’s going to fuel the Mommy Wars and devalue women’s choices.  But I’d like to think more positively about it after watching it. It gives a little insight into a typical my SAHM life and what can happen down the road. And I think it’s good for moms in general to watch other mothers go through what many of us think about as well as show employers that even if you are out of the workforce for awhile you still got ’skillz (er, skills.)

So if they have to throw in a few television cliches in the process I’m not going to sweat it.  I’m going to record it again next week and maybe catch a good movie on Lifetime while I’m at it.  Hey, we all have to live vicariously once in awhile, right?

Tags: The Secret Life of a Soccer Mom,, celebrity+moms, Tracey Gold, mommy wars, working moms, SAHM

I rarely get political on this blog, but Katie Couric’s 60 Minutes interview last night with Hillary Clinton has made me crawl out from under my keep-my-mouth-shut-about-all-things-political bunker.

Uhm, what was up with that?

Hil + KC = BFF

I felt like I was watching a Barbara Walters Oscar special, not a serious interview with a candidate deadlocked in of one of the tightest Democratic contests in years. It’s unfortunate that with all the issues out there to discuss, Katie Couric had to inject her annoyingly-perky self into the questions.  This exchange nearly had me gagging on the remote (thanks to The Swamp for transcribing the hokey).

KATIE COURIC:

Someone told me your nickname in school was Miss Frigidaire. Is that true?

HILLARY CLINTON:

Only with some boys. (laugh)

KATIE COURIC:

I don’t know if I wanna hear the back story on that.

HILLARY CLINTON:

Yeah, well you wouldn’t know the boys either. (laugh)…

I mean, thank g-d Hil  has been called things way worse than “Frigidaire” so she could come up with a good retort.  But the real question/ issue for me was the nature of Katie’s questions and the interview set-up in general. Why didn’t Couric get Obama to interview? What PR person was behind the decision to set the two “working women” up together? Perhaps it wasn’t on purpose, but Katie’s “friendly” demeanor did nothing to but turn her interview with the next potential Commander in Chief into a mind-numbing coffee-klatch.

Instead of questions like, “so explain to me how you’re an underdog” that Steve Kroft asked Obama, Clinton had to explain “how do you do it?” (meaning how do you keep going and going) to the point where Clinton actually admitted she eats hot peppers to maintain her stamina.  Didn’t you know? Jalapeno peppers are the new Coke.

A grande coffee’s got nothing on a couple of these.

Katie, with her affecting demeanor, could have seized the chance to make this woman-on-woman interview something special.  Two smart, successful working moms talking about real issues that matter to the voters.  Instead, Couric turned it into a “oh, won’t you be my best friend right now” type moment that demeaned Senator Clinton and didn’t add anything to her credibility as a news anchor.  I mean, can you just see her moderating a debate?

“Senator McCain, now here’s a serious one - who are you wearing tonight?” 

I mean, please.  You all know I’m supporting Clinton in this election, and what I was hoping to see was the affable interviewer making Clinton a little more like her - likeable.  All I got, though, was a bad stomach ache and the knowledge that giggling over high school nicknames aren’t going to get a woman closer to the Oval Office.

Tags: Katie Couric, Hillary Clinton, 60 Minutes

Last night, my husband suggested that we watch the show Cashmere Mafia again.  I know he’s trying to be supportive about my transition out of the workforce, and truthfully, I’d be the last person to turn down an offer to watch cheesy girlie shows with her very straight husband.

So I obliged, but as the show progressed, I found myself in a worse mood than before it had started. Cashmere Mafia is nothing more than a perpetuation of the worst possible stereotypes of the struggle between working motherhood and SAHM life - one life I’ve known and one that I’ll be privy to in a few short days.

When I watched the show last week I chuckled at the notion that the ”regular working mom,” Zoe, would have the time or the energy to don a neglige and ask her husband “how would you like your steak done?” as they get into bed after hiring and firing a new nanny.  Not only was that line terrible (but one I’ve used jokingly on my husband ever since), but it gives off the impression that not only does this woman have to bust her ass all day in the office, figure out child care (and it appeared her husband did not work) but also come across as a sexy plaything at night. I mean, what working mom has the energy to do that? And don’t get me started on the other working mom caricature, Juliet, who makes Miranda from the Devil Wears Prada look like mother of the year.

But last night’s episode put me over the edge. In the parts of the show that I actually watched, they pitted pitiful Zoe against what appeared to be the SAHM Queen. Decked out in her fancy sweats, making tofu stir fry for her 8 year old, she was the protypical ice princess of the playground.  And when the battle of mommy guilt became too much for our working mom heroine, all she had to do was wave a finger and use her work connections to put the SAHM to shame.  Even blew her off with a fake “conference call.”

Now I’ve pulled the “I’ve got a conference call” line on many a person that I didn’t feel like talking to, but the way it was presented in the show made me uneasy.  It was as if having a conference call to actually attend made her superior to the SAHM cat fight of what moms got to go to the kid’s field trip. Nuh uh, sister.  If a working mom pulled that on me when I become an SAHM I’d slap her BlackBerry silly.

I know Hollywood is a stereotyping machine, and this show wasn’t created to take the moral high ground on such issues of working motherhood, but after suffering through two episodes, I’ve just got to wonder if the television writers of America can’t do better than making women on prime time be such vapid losers.

If not, I’m not so sure I want any of them to come back from being on strike.  I’d rather watch the women duke it out in real life on American Gladiators than deal with the fake mommy wars concoction of Cashmere Mafia.

Tags: cashmere mafia, abc primetime, mommy wars, stereotypes