My vacuum
posted in Mom Rants |When I feel down, I don’t watch TV, read a magazine, call a friend. Nope. I vacuum. It’s been a crappy kind of week in my extended family household and as a result, my house has never looked cleaner.
My lint-weapon of choice is the original Dyson upright. I know it’s ridiculously expensive, heavy, and kind of impractical unless you live in a large, carpeted palace, but the commercials with the intelligent sounding man really sucked me in. Plus, I got the cheapest full-size model, so I didn’t feel that bad about it. And the Dyson makes me feel better when times get tough. If I’m angry, all I have to do is take out my agression on that dustball under the oven.
Hair in the bathroom? Sucked away like yesterday’s bad hair day.
I love the way the Dyson shows you what you’ve picked up along the way. Oh, the things I find when I get really mad at my wool pile rug. The Dyson doesn’t like that rug very much because it always grasps so many fibers in its wake and makes me clean it right away. (Note to self: never ever buy a wool pile rug again.)
If times get really tough and I feel like crying, all I have to do is release the Dyson’s attachment brush and delve into every nook and cranny that hasn’t been cleaned out in three years (way better than my pantry, though). I spent the better part of my son’s nap time yesterday on my baseboards. Wow, that felt good.
But the best part of my vacuum is the waste release system. I love the trapdoor of my vacuum where I can get rid of the waste that clutters its filters. If only it were so easy to rid myself of my bad mood.
My Dyson. A cure-all for a shitty day.
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