Self-Made Mom

I just finished watching the premiere episode of TLC’s new show, “The Secret Life of a Soccer Mom,” and I have to be honest - I liked it way more than I thought I would.  I knew plenty about the show after talking to the host, Tracey Gold, yesterday, but typically I don’t let my DVR record things that have the words “Secret” and “Mom” in the same title (sounds kind of like a bad Lifetime move, don’t you think?).  However, after whizzing through the show in about 45 minutes, I found myself with a bit of a lump in my throat and a little more happiness about the choice I made to be a SAHM.

The first episode centered on Adrian Stark, wife of a doctor and a mom of three.  A wannabe fashion designer before she had kids, the show gave Ms. Stark the opportunity to work for fashion designer Bianca Nero for a week under the guise that she was “going to a spa.” (Hence, the “secret.” Lifetime references abound.) So while she went off to her new “job,” her husband stayed at home watching the girls. It was your typical here’s-what-happens-when-the-mom-works-scenario with the kids running wild and the house in disarray. Let’s just say if there are assistants who cook the food all day while you’re away it’s not that realistic.

And watching Ms. Stark do her assignment was kind of like watching a summer intern at work.  The bosses came down hard and fast and Ms. Stark looked frazzled and nervous.  I can only imagine, though, how she must have felt, considering before I interviewed Ms. Gold yesterday (my first “real” story since I stopped working) I was sweating like a pig.  The point? It’s hard to rejigger your brain into work mode after you’ve been in SAHM mode. I thought the show treated that shift well.

Some folks were a little bothered by the secretive nature of the show, but I just chalked it up to the fact that it’s on TV. I mean, how else were they going to get those moms out of the house? I know if I want to leave for a day I have to book it like 3 weeks in advance, call in major reinforcements and clear it with a slew of people. Anyway, *spoiler alert* at the end of the show, Ms. Stark does a great job, gets the job of her dreams and accepts a full-time position with the designer. Dad seemed truly happy for her and the kids were thrilled. (This is the part where I got a lump in my throat.)  It was sweet, really. You could tell that she loved staying at home with her kids, but wanted to try something new, so kudos to her!

This show isn’t going to be for everyone, though. Some will think it’s going to fuel the Mommy Wars and devalue women’s choices.  But I’d like to think more positively about it after watching it. It gives a little insight into a typical my SAHM life and what can happen down the road. And I think it’s good for moms in general to watch other mothers go through what many of us think about as well as show employers that even if you are out of the workforce for awhile you still got ’skillz (er, skills.)

So if they have to throw in a few television cliches in the process I’m not going to sweat it.  I’m going to record it again next week and maybe catch a good movie on Lifetime while I’m at it.  Hey, we all have to live vicariously once in awhile, right?

Tags: The Secret Life of a Soccer Mom,, celebrity+moms, Tracey Gold, mommy wars, working moms, SAHM

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