I know what boys like

6th February 2008

When I enrolled my son in a gymnastics class last month, I got a few giggles and sidelong glances. Don’t think I didn’t ask myself the same thing, “isn’t gymnastics just for girls?” But two of my SAHM acquaintances signed up for the class as well (with their daughters), and in the hopes of making some new real friends I decided to join them.

My friends and family were mixed on my decision. Some thought the gym studio was better left to leotards and leggings. Others scoffed at my question and said, “of course boys take gymnastics.” In my head I knew boys take gymnastics too, but part of me just couldn’t get past the thought of my son setting forth to do his floor routine in a singlet. Wouldn’t he freeze to death?

Please cover up during ~~all~~ the winter months.

It’s funny, my son and his peers seem to be entering a phase of their young lives where boys start to do “boy” stuff and girls start to do “girl” stuff. I knew this moment would creep up on me eventually, but I made a conscious decision when my son was born to try to steer clear of activities that were biased towards one sex or the other. And so far, it hasn’t been an issue - we all know classes at this age are based on ~~how smart the mother thinks her child is~~ the age of your child .

However, now that my son and his friends are hitting the twos, I’m beginning to see the lines being drawn more clearly. The girls are signing up for dance, the boys are leaning towards activities like soccer. Hell, in our soccer class alone the boy/ girl ratio is something like 152/ 2.

But what do you do when you have a boy who would rather sit on the sidelines of his gymnastics class and eat a bagel than walk on the balance beam? Or one you know would enjoy that dance class that all the girls are enrolling in? I’d like to say that I could let go of the stereotypes and let him rip in a session of ballet. (I think he’d look darling in those black jazz shoes.) But part of me knows that when it comes down to it I will probably err in the direction of what the “boys” are doing. At least until he can tell me he’d rather pirouette than run cross-courts.

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1 On February 6th, 2008, Emily said:

I am a firm believer that if you expose your child to a number of activities and they sway one way, let them! I know it is hard, especially with boys. However, they are drawn to activities for a certain reason. Your son is too young to really know what he loves at this point, but as he gets older, hopefully he will be able to articulate to you what his passions are and I know you will endulge him! I decided to start taking my daughter to a Kindermusik class once a week. We have only been to one, but it was really fun and she loved playing with all the “stuff” the teacher had. Having been a music teacher, I thought, “Is it fair that I am taking her to a music class and not to tumbling or something athletic?” For now, it will have to be because we can’t afford to do both! Maybe in a few months we’ll do something more athletic and see what she has a passion for. She’ll probably love both, like most kids!

2 On February 6th, 2008, April said:

I haven’t signed my son up for dance, then again he hasn’t asked. And at 3.5 he has just gotten to the point of requesting things he likes or wants to try.

He does however, do tumbling once a week with a good portion of his classmates in preschool. He has a male coach, who he adores and has asked on a playdate more than once… thankfully the coach usually just suggests he call his mommy. But nearly all the little boys in his preschool through kindergarten Montessori class do tumbling and they love it.

Until you mentioned it, I hadn’t even thought of it as a “girl” thing - and I was a gymnast!

3 On February 7th, 2008, Shannon said:

I think it’s dumb to force it either way. I would have a problem
with somebody who got all worked up because her son was into girly
toys or activities. But I also get annoyed by people who try to force
boys to do girly things, just to prove a point. I guess it’s just easier
to let your kid decide what he likes, and most likely your kid will
bow to social pressure and pick boy-appropriate interests. And honestly,
I think that’s okay. I have bigger problems to worry about. You have
to pick your battles, and to me this just isn’t an important one.

BTW, this does NOT apply to toddler gynastics. Obviously we know the
reasons to sign your kid up for that is to get the kid some exercise, wear
him out so he’ll sleep better, and get you out of the house meeting
other moms.

4 On February 8th, 2008, Nicole said:

Aack, at 2! My kids love gymnastics, and if I could afford the time and $$ I’d sign them both up.
My 4YO has tumbling at preschool and my 5YO plays pick up soccer with dad and some other kids after
school. Honesly I would love to find a dance class, as they love dancing at home, but I suspect both
dad and the boys would balk. We also signed him up for chess cuz he really wanted that, even though
I pushed hard for theater I don’t want to overschedule him, but he’s in after school care anyway
so figure this wasn’t that different. I personally sucked at all sports, but did choose the soccer
route over gymnastics at camp as a teenager, just didn’t seem quite as difficult. The sideline thing
could simply be your kid’s personality, nothing to do with the activity, so I’d give it time. Not to
take up all your comments but my nephew took a tap class, and was one of the few boys and was just
adorable and had a great time.

5 On February 8th, 2008, Shannanb aka Mommy Bits said:

I had SM in gymnastics when he was 3. I thought it was great for his self esteem and he really became more balanced. His class was actually 4 boys to 3 girls, so pretty even. I know what you mean about the stereotypes. We always got weird looks from people when we would tell them he was taking gymnastics.

Today he’s in soccer, but only because he stopped liking gymnanstics.

6 On February 9th, 2008, Amy S. said:

Yes, girls and boys do have their natural inclinations, but you can’t get too stuck in the stereotypes. My brother took gymnastics for years and was good at it. He was also a great baseball player. Both my daughters loved their dance classes, but my older daughter has dropped it in favor of soccer. This spring will be our 7th season!

7 On June 25th, 2008, Scott S. said:

I took gymnastics for a month or two when I was in grade school. I got fucken RIPPED. Huge muscles and what not, but eventually the stereotype of being a “super fag” got to me and I quit.

Don’t teach them negative sterotypes, please?