3rd October 2007

I’m such a liability they should take out an insurance policy on me

posted in Work-Life Balance, Working Moms, Mom Rants, Office Rants, Mom Bloggers |

insurance.jpgThis blog post on whether pregnancy (or working motherhood) is a liability really caught my eye.  Based on a response to the allegations that Bloomberg LP demoted female employees after they announced their pregnancy, the post’s author, BusinessWeek writer Lauren Young, questions whether or not being pregnant or returning from maternity leave inhibits your ability to move up the corporate ladder.

She thinks it does and so do I.

I am not the same worker that I was before I had my son.

I don’t hide in the working mom “closet” pretending everything is alright on the homefront.  I can’t stay late in the office every night to finish up work (that’s what going online at 8 pm is for!)  I’m working at home more than I’m not because I have some crisis to monitor, and when I should be writing a communications plan I’m usually texting my nanny to see when my son went to bed.

My head’s not in the game lately and it’s costing my team. 

I’m trying to make it all work, but I realize in my head that my priorities have shifted.  I’m not the breadwinner and don’t want to be.  So when push comes to shove and there’s an emergency at home or an emergency at work, guess where I’ll be?

My new boss should have inherited the old me - dilligent worker, top of her game all the time, going the extra mile.

Instead, she’s been saddled with a neurotic mother of a one-and-a-half-year-old trying pretty fruitlessly to make what others deem “the perfect balance” work.  This is definitely something a Band-Aid can’t fix.  And I hope to g-d she has an insurance plan.  Because I could be liable to do something crazy one of these days and just walk away from the scene of the crime.

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There are currently 9 responses to “I’m such a liability they should take out an insurance policy on me”

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  1. 1 On October 3rd, 2007, I’m such a liability they should take out an i… said:

    […] Original post by Self-Made Mom […]

  2. 2 On October 4th, 2007, Shelli said:

    well, if pregnancy is a liability, then my employer must love me being a Mom and a secondary infertile. I can barely make it to my desk lately. The only thing motivating me is the money to pay for my treatments.

  3. 3 On October 4th, 2007, Nancy said:

    I could have written this post too.

    It’s bothering me a lot that I’m not bringing my A-game to work, but as you put it: my head’s not in the game lately.

    Sigh.

  4. 4 On October 4th, 2007, Felicia said:

    Ok, this isn’t hate mail or anything. BUt was it really that bad when you were on your maternity leave? Well, I mean our kids are the same age now and to tell you the truth I like this age then the baby age, but there is so much you can do in the city. Maybe you should try it again. I understand that your field is competive and you have to stay in the loop, but maybe just a month. And just focus on your family. You seem so torn. I mean, you have a nanny and the housekeeper, well no nanny now, but why don’t you enjoy this time with your little, check out a pumpkin farm, find a playgroup. You yourself said that time goes by soon fast. Why not stop and enjoy it.

    Please don’t take this as hate respons, but I was in your shoes, not the breadwinner wanting to balance it all and it didn’t work, I missed out on so much and I couldn’t get that time back. I don’t it was just a thought.
    Felicia

  5. 5 On October 4th, 2007, selfmademom said:

    Felicia- did you read my mind?

  6. 6 On October 4th, 2007, Felicia said:

    lol-no but I have been where you are and I was all about making the working mom thing work, but I sat down one day and relized I paying someone to clean my house, take care of my son, extra to drop off pick up dry cleaner etc..I was paying all these people to live my life and I still felt swamped and over work and tired. I felt that my daughter was getting neglected and so was my hubs. so, we sat down and talked about it and really it was more me giving up control. You know those type A personailties. And I din’t want to be one of those women who gave them selves up, but what I leaned whas that I wasn’t giving anything up, I was getting something so much more in return.It was a copout it was a new adventure. I didn’t have stress anymore about finding my balance and finally, finally I could go to the park and leave the blackberry at home. =)

    wow that turned into a novel.Thanks for not taking mt last relpy wrong, I was afraid to write it, but it just one moms point of view. Good luck! And let me know if you ever want to set a playdate. The Shed has todler tuesdays and boy does she love those fish.
    Felicia

  7. 7 On October 4th, 2007, Felicia said:

    opps, I meant taking care of my daughter. LOL

  8. 8 On October 5th, 2007, April said:

    I hear you. I started here ready to climb the ranks. Now I am content where I am with goals (shhh, don’t tell my manager) to make “meets expectations” every year and not fall too far behind in my chargable hours goals as I take off for appointments and chaperoning field trips. AND I leave everyday at 5pm.

  9. 9 On October 6th, 2007, Liza's Eyeveiw said:

    I could have written this post too (with a little twist but the essence would be the same). I just filed for a one week vacation this week. I told my husband if I didn’t take this vacation, I would end up having a nervous breakdown. I am taking this one week off to re-organize and renew a “game plan”… a working mom “game plan”…

    Thanks for the post.

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