Self-Made Mom

Nanny cams are so 2005.  If you really want to find out what goes on at home while you’re at work, ask your cleaning lady.  She’ll tell you.

Mine did before I broke up with nanny #1.  And she tells me how much she loves nanny #2.  I asked her today, in fact, as my nanny’s out of town this whole week.  (Unfortunately, the cleaning lady doesn’t make for a good nanny back-up. THAT would be awesome.)  Of course, I take her opinion with a grain of salt.   She’s not exactly worried if my nanny is teaching my son to count backward from 100.  (I’m not either, but it sounded like a really good exaggerated example.) But she’s a mother herself and can certainly judge love and care.  And neatness.

I’ve heard from others who’ve hired and fired their child care providers based on what their cleaning ladies think.  I’m being serious.  As far as I’m concerned, our cleaning lady, who’s been with us for over 5 years, who washes my dirty socks and scrubs my toilets gets a say in who watches my son.  It takes guts to clean our toilets.

Plus, for a freaking s***load a little more money, you get A LOT more reliable and first-hand advice about who’s watching your child(ren) without videotapes, internet connections or obsessive computer-watching.  Just use this as an argument when your husband tells you hiring more help around the house is “too Brady Bunch,” or something ludicrous like that.  It’s not. In my demented world, I’m happy that there’s someone else around once a week to see what’s going on.  (I do trust my nanny, though, I swear I do.)

But once in a blue moon, a good cleaning lady could save you a lot of headache.  And dust.

Tags: nanny cam, nannies, child care

I’m pretty new to this whole blogging thing.  In ”blog years,” I’m like a two-year old or something.  A puppy, really (if you care, I like beagles.)  And when it comes to meeting real-life bloggers, I’m still pretty green. I’ve only met like 5 bloggers before this past weekend, so you could imagine I was a little worked up to be around 800 of y’all at BlogHer.  I feel like blogging encapsulates me in this little alternate universe where I can be somewhat anonymous and get away with things I’d never say in person. 

Woof woof.

But at BlogHer, people introduce themselves by their real name AND their blog name, so there’s no hiding.  At BlogHer, you meet people by either staking them out from pictures you’ve seen of them online, by recognizing their babies, by staring at the name tag on their chests, or by sending e-mails to them in vain to try to find them in the gigundo conference space. 

Overall, my first BlogHer conference was a strange, wonderful and disappointing experience all at the same time. 

For instance (a highlight!), I ate a LOT of greasy food while bitching about work with two great new friends.  Who happen to be as HI-larious in person as on their blogs.

Yes, I was nauseous after eating this.

No, my son was not nauseous after eating the leftovers.

I got a ton of free swag because someone out there laughably thinks I’m influential.  But in all seriousness, I can’t believe Jill and Beth hooked us up with so much STUFF. I don’t really need any more STUFF, but it’s cool to say I got STUFF.  I gave my nanny some of the loot and I’m giving some of the other STUFF away HERE if you want swag to fill up your house like it’s filling up mine.

And now, a word from our sponsors.

I met some really neat women, more than I could have ever hoped to meet.  Some I got to speak to for awhile, most I just waved at, winked at, smiled at coyly or nodded head in agreement at.  I also got a lot of funny and creative blog cards (blards), most of which I’m having a hard time matching the blog to the face.  I feel silly that I can’t remember what someone looked like who I met for five seconds, but I’m blaming this problem on the ridiculously loud bar I went to Thursday night, or the I-feel-like-I’m-at-a-bad-corporate-conference speed dating session from the first day.  (I’ll happily brainstorm other ways to network, BlogHer ladies!) 

I went to learn, connect and experience, just like a newbie should.  But unfortunately, I was a little underwhelmed by the learning part.  I think I had an expectation that it would be more like a “conference” and less like a blog.  But every session I attended, with the exception of the building traffic one, was like I was visiting the set of some blog reality show.  People stated their opinions out loud.  And then everyone commented.  Out loud.  And then some people were just LOUD.  But unlike the internet, you couldn’t click to another page.  Also, you didn’t really WANT to opt-out of the conversation because you had spent $200 to listen to it.  But, I didn’t want to spend my weekend debating labels, discussing the pros and cons of monetization or by getting legal advice (I’m married to a lawyer for that.) I wanted to walk away with some hard and fast facts for how I can be a better blogger in my space.  Or ways I could make a few bucks to pay for my grande-nonfat-extra-hot-chai-latte without “turning my blog into a billboard.” (Love that line, L.)

Bow wow.

I’m just saying. I do have a teensy-weensy bit of experience in event planning.

Anyway, overall, it was worth it, and I’m glad I went.  I really would have regretted not experiencing the biggest gathering of women at a conference anywhere in the country (!!!).  But you’re gonna have to throw me more than a dog bone to get me back next year.

Maybe I’m more like a kitten. (Down, kitty!) Meow.

Tags: blogher07

It’s Day Two of BlogHer 07.  My hair looks as about as bad and I’m about as tired as when my son was a newborn. Ok, I’m exaggerating a little bit, but I have been staying at home, while Stefania, Susan, Elizabeth (I know her secret name!), and Robin have been living it up at the W.  I still have to deal with the reality of waking up with my son at 6 am. Ouch.

Not to mention that it’s like 90% humidity out. I’m so glad I spent the time to dry my hair this morning.  At least Lawyer Mama and Pundit Mom still let me sit next to them at breakfast even though I look like Bozo the clown (I’m wearing a polka dot shirt as well - that’s not helping.)  I can’t wait to show Susan the flip flops I am wearing today, though. That’ll make it all worth it.

More Live from BlogHer soon!

Tags: blogher07

More “liveblogging” - Hello! Sitting in session right now about how to use technology to raise awareness of your site. You can find the whole presentation here, but if you’re like me, and have little attention span for PowerPoint, here are some of the highlights:

• Link out
• Leave comments on other blogs
• Participate at blog events
• Join social networking groups
• Contribute to the community

Optimizing your site:

• Fix your broken links - www.alexa.com
• How do people come to your blog? Engage in social bookmarking and understand your audience
• Tip- animated blog feed graphic- feedburner
• Press

Syndication:

• Personalize your Google page with feeds from all over the place (Google webmaster tools)
• Allows users to customize how they want to read your content
• Put special buttons on your site for sign up - myYahoo!, Google, MyMSN
• Feedburner is an easy way to create your feed: www.feedburner.com
• Make sure your code has “auto discovery” in it - a place for the engine to find your feed

Search Engine Optimization:

• If you write useful, relevant information, that’s what the search engines want
• Discovery- search engines have to know your site exists
• Crawlability - text is better than images for search
• Relevance - make sure it’s easy to figure out what your site is about
• Building your site- do some thinking about what your site is about
• Research search phrases - yahoo and Google - it’s the words that count
• Title tag is very important
• Watch your domain name
• Cross posting- search engine usually just wants to show one version of the page so have a link back to your own site

Interesting Q&A session at BlogHer currently about self-promotion and self-branding. Professionals Penelope Trunk, Nina Burokas, and Stephanie Cockerl have some good insights about building and maintaining your own personal brand and blog.  This is all being written while sitting on the floor for an hour-and-a-half, so bear with me.

• Self-branding is like 5th grade- be smart with the smart kids and hip with the popular kids.
• You can blog about everything! You can’t blog about knitting AND politics - so pick one.
• You need to have a unique voice and find something that makes you stand out.
• A good way to build traffic on your site is to write posts that intersect two areas that interest you- like if you are an astronaut and write about diapers (all jokes aside) that might be interesting. But if you are an astronaut writing about being an astronaut, well, that’s not all that insightful.
• Good etiquette on the blogosphere is all about making the conversation- if you want to have conversations, blog. If you don’t, then write in a print medium.
• A way to get known on the blogosphere is being authentically interesting and being interested in others.
• Take some risks!
• Some good sites: www.progblogger.net, www.copyblogger.com, www.profnet.com, www.prleads.com

Oh, did I mention I didn’t bring enough business cards with me? Guess I failed in self-promotion today.

By the way, I just caught the facts. For a good opinion on the mood of this session (maybe it was too early in the morning?) click here.

“Liveblogging now from the BlogHer conference!” MyBlogHer experience started out with a bang last night.  Amy thankfully wrote a great wrap-up of our girls’ night out thanks to Silicon Valley and Chicago Moms Blog.  There were lots of drinks and swag to go around.  I’ll be happy to share some of the stuff with y’all after I go through the voluminous bag I received.

After I went to the cocktail party I hopped over to the W and got to meet two of my favorite bloggers, Elizabeth and Susan. I am off to a good start.  Working hard to learn a lot and meet tons of folks.

Now, I’m sitting in a session about “Self-Branding” and “Self-Promotion.”  Fitting, right? I’ll post more soon!

Tags: blogher07

That title get you? Did you actually think I meant that I was going to start working instead of blogging? Ha! No seriously.  I looked back at some of my recent posts and realized I’ve taken a bit of a vacation from writing about what really gets me going - the ups and downs of working motherhood (with a bit of celebrity thrown in.)  But this week I’ve had some good conversations with some “experts” and read some interesting articles I need to report back to you all on.  Hopefully this will tide y’all over until I can “live blog” at BlogHer. (Didn’t that sound all big and bad?)  Here goes:

You say Ay-quent, I say Ah-quent: 
So today, I spoke with Denise Nash of Aquent (it’s pronounced ay-quent, not ah-quent) - the staffing agency for marketing professionals.  Denise is the “Director of Work-Life” for the organization and helps Aquent with sponsorships, build awareness, etc.  The company has been around for 20 years and staffs marketing experts on a project basis. They’re huge - 70 offices in 16 countries! Most of their “consultants” are MBAs with 5-7 years experience.  I checked out the website and it seems like they have some really promising opportunities for people who want to be staffed on short-term-to-permanent jobs. 

Does process work with part-time?
Yesterday, I had lunch with an old professor of mine from graduate school.  (By old, I don’t mean age, I mean I went to school awhile ago.) Over the biggest Chinese chicken salad I ever saw, we discussed my current part-time work situation.  He began to tell me his dealings with a major major corporation and their adherence to the Six Sigma practice. He challenged me with this question: Can you work in a part-time capacity and still fulfill the tenets of Six Sigma or some other corporate mumbo-jumbo process? Of course, my inital reaction was “yes,” but really, I’m too brain-dead to fully figure out the answer. What do you think? I told him I’d get back to him with a response. Stat. Or else he said he was going reverse my grade point or something evil like that.

Some gratuitous B-celebrity working mom news:
It’s been awhile since we’ve gotten good “celeb” working mom news.  But I read two stories today that caught my eye:

1. Did you know Lindsay Davenport is back on the courts? She must be super-human because she only had a C-section like 6 weeks ago.  I mean, she’s not playing in the U.S. Open, or anything, so she’s not that cool, but still.  My favorite line from the article: “It’s [her return to work] turned into a bigger story than I’m comfortable with.”  See? The media is STARVING for a new celeb working mom.  You go, Linds.
2. My favorite news anchor is preggo!! Campbell Brown, who dresses way too conservatively for me, but who’s no-nonsense attitude I love is with child.  And she’s got a new job at CNN, where she will be eight months pregnant when she goes on the air! Talk about interviewing for a new job knowing that you’re already pregnant.  And I love that she thinks she’ll be ready to go back to work by Feb. 5 for big-state primaries.  That’s so cute, Campby.

That’s all I got for now… toodles til’ BlogHer!

Tags: Campbell Brown, Lindsay Davenport, working mom, Aquent, Denise Nash, BlogHer

BlogHer is upon me.  The e-mails are flying.  And I’m just sitting here reading them, getting seriously nervous very excited to be in a room full of women bloggers and to see some of the amazingly-talented folks I’ve been reading over the past eight months since I entered the blogging world.  But, there are a few things I need to do in order to prepare for the big weekend ahead: 

• Figure out what I’m going to wear to the Thursday night get together that the founders of Chicago (and Silicon Valley AND New York) Moms Blog coordinated.  I’ll be coming straight from work which will provide an additional sartorial challenge.  Luckilly, my friend Susan over at The Working Closet gives some great advice about how I can transition from biz casual to *stylish* blogger.  A dress it is, Susan.  With heels instead of flip flops!
• Drop off my son’s old Pack ‘N Play at the W.  No, not for me.  Only for like the most famous-mommy-blogger-ever.  I can’t believe the progeny of Kristen is going to be peeing playing all over my son’s play pen!
• Introduce myself in 10 seconds.  What can I tell you that you don’t already know? I’m much shyer in person than on my blog.  And probably a lot less funny. I’m tall (in those heels I’ll be wearing I’m like reaaaallly tall.) I’m going to try to keep my oily skin under control in the humid Chicago night.  I like apple martinis, which I will certainly be ordering throughout the weekend. Was that 10 seconds worth of information? I don’t want to ramble. That will scare you off. Right?
• Oh, and I also decided to add advertising to my blog. I have thought about it for awhile, and as a result of the recent debate and resulting conversation, I made a decision to try it out.  I don’t think the world’s going to end if I have more petty cash to waste at Starbucks to caffeinate myself before the conference.  As long as I bring my own mug.

I think that’s it. But if you think of anything else that I might need to be nervous about prepare for, can you like, give me a head’s up or something? 

Tags: blogme2007

I used to be pretty cool.  Like, I knew which bars were trendy, which restaurants were hot and what an acceptable “going out” outfit looked like. Occasionally, if the mood struck me, I would even venture out to a club. Where the music was loud, I couldn’t hear my friends, but I didn’t really care because we were all there just to flirt with guys anyway.  (You’re lying if you say you didn’t do the same.)

I know this all sounds very cliche, and really, I’m not trying to paint myself as an old fart or anything (I’m just going to be hitting the big 3-0 this year), but in the last 5 years I’ve lost some of that “I know what’s going on” cache.  Reality of being a mom has hit and I really just don’t have time to follow all the latest and greatest like I used to.

A sure sign that something’s changed in me: I’m joining a ladies’ Bunco club.  Don’t know what bunco is? Well neither do I, really, but my good friend Danielle organized the group, and I’m not one to turn down a girls’ night out. Ever.  Plus, there’s something very appealing to me now about sitting around playing dice with lots of sassy women.  I’m going clubbing, mom style.  And that’s just fine with me.

I just finished reading a surprisingly-not-trashy-and-well-written book about Princess Di.  And then, because I couldn’t get enough of the Royal Family for one summer I watched a movie about them last night. (The Queen, if you must know. No, I hadn’t seen it yet. Remember I had a baby last year?)

Anyway, can I just say, there’s no work-life balance going on in Buckingham Palace?

We all think we have it tough because we have to juggle the demands of our family and our jobs.  But, hello? We can’t really complain.  For one, we don’t have to deal with that whole ”Divine Right” thing.  And we didn’t foolishy make a statement awhile ago to the whole freaking country about how we’d be ”devoted to your service and the service of our great imperial family to which we all belong.” For our whole life. Who makes those kinds of promises? I can’t even promise to call my friends back.  

I mean, seriously.  The Queen’s got some great jewelry, but her family is more dysfunctional than mine and she always has to pretend that she’s happy or content or something.  Doesn’t she ever just want to rip off those heavy-looking dresses, let her curls loose and say, “bugger-off you all, I just want to watch Oprah in peace!”?

I’m just sayin’.  I think we got it good.

Tags: The Queen, The Diana Chronicles, Royal Family, Queen of England, work-life balance