Self-Made Mom

My vacation is ending, and my time in the mountains has taught me a new skill: traffic cop.  Looking back at what was supposed to be the perfect, no-worry vacation, was more like a long lesson in how to direct honking vehicles on a crowded highway.

It’s not that I wasn’t without help.  Those in line to pitch in were my nanny, my husband, my mom and dad (”we’re here to help!” “we want you to relax!”) and brother (also known as the uncle who can rile my son up right before he’s supposed to go to sleep.)  Yes, those of you with your jaws dropped right now, I “vacationed” with my whole family.

There were lots of extra helpful hands to change diapers (I think I changed 2 all week), feed junior and play “roll the ball” with him until his hands were bruised.  The problem then? I had to coordinate family traffic - otherwise known as - how can we maximize the little time we have (mind you, I’ve been here for a week) to spend with our grandson/nephew/son?

This whole “scheduling thing” is probably my fault. Because I’m so anal, I wanted to make sure “everyone had a good time.” So, with the masses lined up and fuel tanks burning off gas with every minute of stalled traffic, I found myself directing the every moves of all my son’s awake hours.  A glimpse of my self-imposed madness:

6:15 am: Rise and shine - no one wanted this shift, so me and DH got up most days. Nanny saved us on a few.

7:30 am: Mom and Dad? You want junior? Great I’ll bring him downstairs then.

8:00 am: Breakfast time - Mom, you can feed him. Nanny can you prepare the meal? No, I don’t care what he eats.

8:45 am: Nap time - You guys duke this one out, I’m going back to sleep for an hour.

10:10 am: The monitor lights start flashing. Who wants to get junior out of bed, hubby? Okay, great, it’s your turn.

[11 am - 4 pm: Ski break! Woo-hoo! Freedom from baby traffic diversion.]

4:30 pm - Snack time, Mom, you on this? I want to take a jacuzzi.

5:30 pm - Brother, I swear to god, if you throw him around after eating and he pukes, you’re cleaning it up.

6:00 pm - Bath time - Hubby always gets stuck with bathtime.

6:45 pm - Bed time - Raise your hands if you want to put junior to bed. Dad? You up for it? You will have to read him 5 books, you know.  Okay, great.

7:00 pm - I’m off duty.

Guess who relaxed the most? You guessed it, the nanny.  Oh boy, I can’t WAIT to go back to work on Monday.  Peace and quiet.  Oh, I forgot, I have to get on a plane for a meeting.  Maybe vacation isn’t so bad after all.

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